Okay, I'll admit it....I was surprised to hear the news at first. Starbucks is going to close 600 of their stores and eliminate up to 12,000 jobs. Now, being the Starbucks afficianado that I am, I immediately wondered how that woud affect us here....how will I get my FIX!?!
They say they're going to close stores that are too close to other ones (following the "last one in, first one out" rule I assume, newer stores closer to older ones will be gone) and others that just aren't doing that well.
First of all, most of these closures better be in New York and Chicago. Both cities seem to have a store on every single freakin' block. (see photo above) There are Starbucks across the street from another Starbucks there for cryin out loud! The people there can walk the extra 20 seconds to get to the one 100 feet away that's staying open.
Now how will it affect us here in Northeast Ohio? Perhaps I could add a little insight. I've been to a lot of them in the area..and based on the experiences I've had at them, here's who should stay...and here's who should GO.
In no particular order....
STARBUCKS GARFIELD HEIGHTS: Bad Bad BAAAD. Okay, you know how interns are on the bottom of the food chain at a job? Well imagine these interns - inexperienced, bumbling, slow, unsure - have taken over your workplace and are running the show. Yep, that's the kind of service you get in good ol' Sbucks Gar Hts! Just plain bad. They're slow, unfriendly, can't make coffee...they can't even put the right LIDS on top of the cups. No really. More than once, the lids didn't match up - and when you would grasp onto the cup, after a few seconds the lid would pop off. There goes coffee all over you or your car! Anyway, mark my words - they're going to close this one. It's days are numbered...plus it sits on top of a landfill. Mmmmm, dangerous waste gasses in your Grande Mocha Frappucino.
GRADE: F
STARBUCKS INDEPENDENCE (Rockside Rd): Solid for the most part. Coffee is good, service is decent and employees are mainly friendly. It's right down the road from a giant office park (which includes the mighty Clear Channel Cleveland) and the white-collar crowd flocks there in droves. Occasionally radio personalities do as well. Ha. One thing - they tend to run out of coffee and forget to brew a new batch plus they forget to refill the cream a lot. It's like their in denial of how busy they are or something. They could benefit from stepping up their game a little but they're safe. Closing Internbucks will make them even busier. Oh great!
GRADE: B
STARBUCKS BROADVIEW HEIGHTS: Can we just clone (yes CLONE) this one and put it in Garfield Heights? Then they can keep that one open. So yes, the best of them all is in Broadview Hts. You can't go wrong here. The employees here are extra friendly and still manage to bust their ass all while making a great drink every single time. They've even got two sugar/cream stations that are always stocked. They brew other flavors alongside the blah Pike Place. If you buy a bag of coffee to brew on your own, they give you a free coffee without you having to ask. They rule. If they close, I'll drink disgusting Caribou Coffee for a month straight and take pictures of me drinking it with a oh-man-this-is-so-disgusting look on my facce to prove it. That's how confident I am that this one isn't going anywhere.
GRADE: A+
STARBUCKS-IN-A-TARGET (ANY OF THEM): Close all of these. No really. They suck. I remember the Streetsboro one had a guy that didn't know how to make Iced Coffee. Besides that instance of bad service (they should promote him to Garfield Heights!) their coffee just tatstes funny. Every single one of them no matter which one you go to and what kind of blend it is. I think it has something to do with the machines they use to brew it and the thermos-looking objects they store it in. Avoid these ones if you can...and if this is all you have in your town/they close a store and keep one of these open.....well, have you considered moving?
GRADE: D*
*why better than Garfield? Because Garfield can't use the excuse of the sh&##y machines/thermos things!
STARBUCKS HUDSON: Okay this one is tricky. This is one of the most visually pleasant stores I have ever seen. It looks like they took 3/4 of some old mansion and slapped a Starbucks logo and sign on it. Well, that's exactly what they probably did. This was once someone's house and obviously they were rich, this is Hudson we're talking about people! It needs to fit in with the rest of the scenery in order to pass the Hudson zoning laws. (Even the McDonalds in Hudson appears to be some fine-dining establishment.) The place is HUGE and easily the most unique Starbucks we've got. Annnnnd then it all goes to shit. The workers? Mainly snooty. And unhappy. On more than one occasion we've busted them openly complaining about their jobs/managers loud enough for anyone to hear. No matter how many times we went there (and have stopped going by the way, been months) they seemed to either mess up the order (is it so hard to comprehend putting a grande in a venti cup?They've screwed this easy task up countless times when Krissy would ask for it) or the drink just tastes too strong or kinda "off". They're like a poor-man's Independence as far as the quality goes all inside a picture-perfect pretty little box. Make the Hudsonites drive their BMW's to Twinsburg! Close it for a week and freak 'em all out! Maybe that will teach them a lesson.
GRADE: A+ (for the appearance) / D- (for service)
STARBUCKS TWINSBURG: Just okay. Krissy really likes them but I don't find it to be anything more than "hey whatever, it's there I guess". They are brand new and probably hurting some of the Hudson business down the road so I wonder what they'll do with it....it's a brand new stand alone building so I don't know what they'd do with it f it closed down. Put a Dunkin' Donuts in it? Hmmmm!
GRADE: B-
STARBUCKS BRUNSWICK: The gem of the kinda-West Side area. Okay, best of the west-of-I-71 stores! Not all that big, it's a tight squeeze for customers; there's more room for the worker area which is kind of odd. They've got the friendliest employees there by far; sometimes a little too much so; they'll chat your head off and you'll feel bad for the large line swelling behind you that is being ignored thanks to the conversation...that you're trying to end and sulk away from. Ha - I'm coming down on service that might be too good? Nah, you just shouldn't be so talky talky at the expense of other customers. Keep it movin, Brunstucky! But they are really good here. Almost Broadview-good! Better than the one in Strongsville too.
GRADE: A-
Strongsville GRADE: B
STARBUCKS PARMA: There are two of them, one right by Parmatown Mall and another that shares a plaza with a Quiznos. Close the latter, it's got no soul; it's been dead the few times I've been there and the workers always seem bored and zombie-like. The Parmatown location is new and pretty popular; they've got this cool display with all the pictures of their regulars. Nice touch.
Parmatown GRADE: B+
That other one's GRADE: C for CLOSE it
STARBUCKS WEST 6TH: I generally like this one the best out of them all downtown because it's got a cool atmosphere and good service. But unless you live downtown or are staying a nearby hotel, it sucks because there is nowhere to park (unless you are insane and park across the street for 10 bucks) and then they close early. (Restaurant/bar crowd anyone?) It's mainly for those droves of people who live downtown. Like we're New York or something.
GRADE: B for Best one downtown but bulldoze something and make a parking lot for it. Oh that's gonna get all the non-corporate hippies underwears in a bunch! It's a joke! Kinda.
I'll stop there even though I've been to others, you get the idea. Now if only we could all be like Tommy Lee of Motley Crue fame and just buy all of the real deal Starbucks equipment and put it in our houses. That would rule. Oh and I bet he gets the lid sizes right even when he's drunk off his ass which probably happens a lot. See Garfield Hts Internbucks, HE can do it better than you even when he's blitzed!
Labels: cleveland, starbucks, starbucks closing
Got Sadie groomed today...here she is rockin her pink bandana (LOL) and posing for the camera.
Buffy had to get in on the action too.
She loves KERPLUNKing down on the hardwood floor..
Breakdancing?
Krissy and I took in a Tribe game on Sunday with our friends Jeff and Carrie...we had the elevator operator snap a quick picture of us on the way to the club seats.
See those clouds? Yeah it started raining off and on around the 4th inning...and we lost to the Reds. But man did I eat and eat, ha! (hey it was free!) We had a great time.
Uh-oh. Buffy likes the bags.
Seconds before yanking that away from her and trying to explain that the bag is not a BONE!
